The 10 Laws of Life

Being a real fan of simplicity I love these very simple insights to the ideal laws of life.....

Life Law #1:   You either get it, or you don't.

 Become one of those who gets it.

Life Law #2:   You create your own experience.

Acknowledge and accept accountability for your life.

Life Law #3:   People do what works.

Identify the payoffs that drive your behaviour and that of others.

Life Law #4:   You cannot change what you do not acknowledge.

Get real with yourself about your life and everybody in it.

Life Law #5:    Life rewards action.

Make careful decisions and then pull the trigger.

Life Law #6:    There is no reality; only perception.

Identify the filters through which you view the world.

Life Law #7:    Life is managed.  It is not cured.

Learn to take charge of your life.

Life Law #8:    We teach people how to treat us.

Own, rather than complain about how other people treat you.

Life Law #9:    There is power in forgiveness.

Open your eyes to what anger and resentment are doing to you.

Life Law #10:  You have to name it before you can claim it.

Get clear about what you want and take your turn.

Source: “Life Strategies” by Phillip C. McGraw,

    New York: Hyperion Books, 1999.  ISBN 0-7868-6548-2

The Power of Curiosity

Being Curious

Curiosity killed the cat, they say…but only after it had used up its nine lives.  Being inquisitive and interested in people, things, and events is an admirable characteristic, both because it increases your own learning and also because it’s infectious.  If you display curiosity, those around you will be more curious than they would otherwise have been.

This will not only empower you you'll gain greater understanding, stronger relationships and learning from your friends, employees, peers or fellow networkers. 

An open, enquiring mind is a pre-requisite for continuous learning and development.  The alternative, a closed mind, is a recipe for stagnation and for the rate of change to exceed the rate of learning.

If you’re not already the sort of person who displays curiosity, it’s possible for you to learn to become so.  How easy or difficult this will be depends on your starting point.  If you feel curious, interested, and inquisitive…but don’t exhibit those behaviours, it’s comparatively easy to adopt behaviours that will demonstrate your curiosity.  You could, for example, embrace a commitment to talk to people about what interests them, ask lots of questions, and demonstrate how interested you are in them.  By feeling interested you’re already halfway there and these behaviours should be quite easy to adopt.

If you don’t feel interested, it’s quite possible to feign interest.  Most people will discover that if they pretend to be interested then they start to feel interested (fake it till you make it).  Your outward, exhibited behaviour will affect your inner feelings…rather than the other way round.

Curiosity provides the springboard for learning and development.  Curious, inquisitive people tend to:

• ask lots of questions

• think out loud

• play devil’s advocate

• dig and delve to find out more

• formulate and reformulate “theories”

• have lots of ideas

• challenge conventional thinking

This is an admirable list.  The downside is that people who are curious will often flit, butterfly-like, from one interest to another and not sustain their enthusiasm for any one thing.  As a result they fail to see things through to a conclusion.  They are good starters, but poor finishers.  If this describes you, even just sometimes, you can correct this tendency by working to maintain your interest, continually checking to ensure that your people are completing the things they've started.

Consistent curiosity is vital…the lifeblood of continuous improvement.  All learning and development emanates from an insatiable curiosity.

And that’s worth thinking about…

Change the World

Admiral McRaven's top 10 tips for students to change the world. This is excellent and applies to all of us, at home, personally and in business. Watch his speech to see for yourself.

1. Make your bed every day - making your bed everyday into a profession. The wisdom of a a simple act.

2. Everyone must paddle. You can't change the world alone.

3. Measure a person by the size of their heart not the size of their flippers.

4. Get over being a sugar cookie and continue to pursue your goals with vigour.

5. Don't be afraid of the circuses, there's no such thing as failure only feedback. 

6. Sometimes you have to slide down the rope head first. Risk doing something different.

7. Don't back down from the sharks, confront your fears.

8. You must be your very best at the darkest moments under the keel.

9. Start singing when your up to your neck in mud, one person is all it takes to give hope.

10. Don't ever ring the bell.

So having listened to Admiral McRaven what little tasks to you need to complete daily to help along the way with the big tasks? How well does your team function, do they all have a paddle? How do you measure other people? How determined are you to pursue your goals? How do you react when the going gets tough? Have you the strength and courage to do something different? When the sharks are circling how do you control your fear? Where do you find your inner strength at the darkest moments? How do you get into a positive place when the negative wants to overwhelm you? Will you ever ring that bell? 

Carrot, Egg or Coffee Bean

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her.  She didn't know how she was going to make it and how she wanted to give up.  She was tired of fighting and struggling.  It seemed that as one problem was resolved, a new one arose.  Her mother took her to the kitchen.  She filled three pots with water.  In the first, she dropped a handful of carrots, in the second she a few eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil without saying a word.  In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners.  She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl.  She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.  Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.  Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me, what do you see?"

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," the daughter replied.  The mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots.  The daughter did and noted that they got soft.  Mother then asked her to take an egg and break it.

After pulling off the shell, daughter observed the hard-boiled egg.  Finally, Mother asked her to sip the coffee.  The daughter smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.  The daughter then asked.  "What's the point, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity…the boiling water…but each reacted differently.  The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting.  However after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.  The egg had been fragile.  Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior.  But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.  The ground coffee beans were unique, however.  After they were in the boiling water they had changed the water.  "Which are you?" she asked her daughter.  "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond?  Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?"  Think of this: Which am I?  Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?  Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat?  Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a break-up, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff?  Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart? Or am I like the coffee bean?  The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain.  When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor.  If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.  When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate to another level?  How do you handle adversity?

So, which are you…a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?

Some people make the future; most wait for the future to make them.

And that's worth thinking about…

What Would You Do If You Wern't Scared

WOW, I have just read cover to cover 'Who Moved My Cheese' and felt compelled to share my

thoughts with you all. As a cheese lover I love the analogy Dr Spencer Johnson (The Author) uses, so simple, such a great impact regarding the response to and impact of change.

In life whether at home or at work change happens, how do you react to it? Do you resist and procrastinate of it being unfair, not acceptable or that great cry of 'its not broken don't change it'. Do you embrace change and are  aware of your beliefs and fears so as to manage and control them and not let them overwhelm you. Are you a sniff or scurry type who watches for change and reacts to it.

We will all have encountered change, like it or not, to succeed you must be adaptive, all to often we over analyse change rather than reacting to the simple impacts and moving on. In the same context we need to ensure we are always aware and ready should change occur, be prepared, which can be achieved through awareness of the situation. There is no doubt you have to react quickly to change, maintain momentum by not being anchored to the old but released to establish and find the new. ultimately move with change and enjoy the challenge, indeed why not seek out new opportunities, be a change maker, move forward and grow.

I found this 10 minute cartoon on You Tube worth the whole family watching, enjoy..........

Why is Planning So Important

In his book, "What They Don't Teach You at Harvard Business School," Mark McCormak made an interesting discovery about the 1979 graduating MBA class. Within the group, 3% had written goals, 13% had thought of some goals and the balance were just thrilled to be out of school (I am sure you remember those feelings).

The interesting part was what happened ten years later. Here are the results of their success after a decade:

The group that had non-written goals were making TWICE in the field compared to the 84% of those who had no goals leaving Harvard.

The group with written goals was making TEN TIMES what the other 97% were making on average.

I think you would agree that the folks at Harvard have a long history of knowing what they are doing. So if the top 3% were able to make TEN TIMES the money as everyone else by simply writing out their goals, why aren't you doing it?

We are already through the hardest part of the 'recession' and yet people and businesses are still worried that our economic situation is dire. Resolutions made back at the beginning of the year, to get in better shape, to be a better golfer, to give more to charity, to be the best parent or spouse or partner that you could be may be starting to fade if they haven't already. But who says making and keeping resolutions is just for the beginning of a year. Why wait?

Make sure that one of the resolutions you set and keep right now is to make a strong plan for yourself and your business; ones with enough detail that you can actually make progress against them on a consistent basis.

Write down ALL your goals you have for the next year. Then, find someone to share them with and have them check up on you monthly (quarterly at a minimum) to see if you are making progress. Have them hold you accountable with winnings and loosing for completion.

ActionTIP: Make milestones and chip away at each goal a little everyday so the overall picture doesn't seem so overwhelming.

If you do this, then it won't be long before you are making TEN TIMES more than your competition.


 

WHY DO I NEED A BUSINESS COACH

Why Should You Have a Business Coach?

 

 

A Business Coach is just like a sporting coach. A sporting coach pushes an athlete to achieve optimum performance, provides support when they are exhausted and teaches the athlete to execute plays that their competition does not anticipate.

A sporting coach will make you run more laps than you feel like. A sporting coach will tell it like it is. And a sporting coach will listen.

The role of the Business Coach is to coach business owners to improve their business through guidance, support and encouragement. They help the owners of small and medium sized businesses with their sales, marketing, management, team building and so much more. Just like a sporting coach, your Business Coach will make you focus on the game.

The owners of small to medium sized businesses find it hard enough to keep pace with all the changes and innovations going on in today's modern world, let alone to find the time to devote to sales, marketing, systems, planning and team management, and then to run their businesses as well!

As the world of business moves faster and becomes more competitive, having a Business Coach is no longer a luxury; it has become a necessity.  Your Business Coach at ActionCOACH Northwest Houston is trained to not only show you how to increase your business revenues and profits but also how to develop your business so that you as the owner can work less and relax more.

Your Business Coach will become your marketing manager, your sales director, your training coordinator; your confidant, your mentor. Your ActionCOACH will help you make your dreams come true ...

 

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/007146672X/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1634&creative=6738&creativeASIN=007146672X&linkCode=as2&tag=visisuppandch-21

The GROW Model

The GROW Model is a tool which can help you or your coach to set goals and develop the action plan.  Whilst it is most commonly used in the context of one-on-one coaching, it can be employed in the context of personal goal setting too as a gauge to ensuring the goal is truly attainable. The GROW Model is essentially a framework for directing effective questions about the goal and its achievement.  It consists of 4 stages:

 

Goal: This stage involves us focusing your attention solely on the goal that you desire.  Here it is important that we employ all the tools and guidelines applicable to goals and the goal setting process.  The outcome of this stage should be a goal that is both clearly and precisely defined; accepting of course that it may well change in the future.  It will almost certainly require a self dialog and asking yourself questions, such as “what do I want to achieve”, “how might I make this goal more specific”, “how can I make this goal measurable” and “do I really think that my goal is achievable by me through my own efforts”?  We might also ask ourselves, “are there any sub-goals that I might include as milestones to reaching my goal” and “when do I want to have achieved my goal by”? Many of the questions can be formed though the SMART approach.

 

Reality: This stage involves us considering your current situation by reflecting upon where you are “now” in relation to the goal.  This must be done objectivity, however it is very easy at this stage to allow limiting beliefs to creep

in; be cautious.  Often people distort their reality with the opinions, judgements, expectations and beliefs of other people, in addition to those that they undoubtedly hold themselves.  For this reason it is important you maintain a degree of detachment and be descriptive rather than evaluative.  At the end of this stage it is usually worth checking that the original goal that we made is still valid and holds a level of priority, a solid reason why.  Many people find that they need to amend it in light of what they have learned about themselves during the reality stage.  The type of questions you ask yourself may include, “what is my current situation now with respect to my goal”, ”how close to my goal am I”, “what are the reasons for this” and “how do I think achieving my goal will make me think, feel and act in the future”? 

 

Options: Having looked at the reality of the current situation, this stage involves considering the options available in terms of how you might make the goal a reality.  It is important to recognise, however, that the purpose of this stage is not so much to find the “right” answer, as it is to create and list as many alternatives as possible.  In doing so, you should continually try to think “outside of the box”, whilst reflecting objectively on the relative strengths and weakness of each option, what things we might already have in support of each option, and yet other things you might need.  Throughout this stage you must

remain aware of negative assumptions such as “that option wouldn’t work” or “I wouldn’t be allowed to do that”.  By asking yourself effective questions, or better still getting other people to ask them, such as your coach, you can over-ride this negative and self-limiting tendency and challenge the reality of our situation by asking ourselves “what are the reasons for me thinking this way”.  Similarly, the “what if” approach often produces yet more options.  In this way you may ask yourself, “what if I had more time” or “what if this wasn’t the case”.  Often, however, you might be unable to see an option that someone else can, so be open to suggestion.  Here, you may ask others, “are there any options that I haven’t yet considered?”  But having asked the question we must at least be prepared to consider the answer!  Examples of other questions that you might ask during this stage might include “how might I achieve this goal”, “how have other people achieved similar goals” and “what other options might I have open to me”?

 

Will: Whilst the Options stage is about what you “could” do, the Will stage is about what you “will” do.  This is arguably the most important stage because it is the one in which decisions are made and from which action is derived.  It is during this stage that you ask yourself “what option/'s will I choose?”  Having run down our list of options and summarised them, you may well have just one preferred option that you wish to act upon or several that you wish to implement at once.  Alternatively you may prioritise several options on the basis of “if that doesn’t work then I’ll do this”.  Once you have made your choice, it is often a good idea to check that our chosen course of action will help achieve your goal.  It is then essential to commit to your time scale by asking ourselves, “when will I start working towards my goal?”  If we have employed the GROW Model properly, committing to our action plan in this way is the natural conclusion to the goal setting process.

This is a great web site

21 - 30 Days to change

Back in the 70s NASA conducted a study, astronauts
were fitted 24 hours a day with goggles that inverted their visual fields. This visually turned their entire world upside down. To monitor the stress of constant inversion, physiological responses, such as higher blood pressure and heart rate, were tracked. It was not until around the 21 days of wearing the glasses, that the astronauts began to mentally accept their altered world and show physical signs of being unstressed and comfortable in their new environment. In fact, some of the astronauts took off their goggles for a period of time and they found that the reconditioning started again. This means that you need consistent, daily focus and attention over a 21 day span.

So What? The Bottom Line Up Front (BLUF) regards the need to be consistent in change, if you allow a set period (significant period) between 21 - 30 days to master the change of a habit it will and is more likely to become a replacement of the habit. Here in the TED video Matt Cutts highlights this as trying something new for 30 days.  So go on have a go try something new, but don't take my word for it.......